shlomif_tech [shlomif]

Yesterday, I had the idea of creating some “facts” about the NSA - the United States National Security Agency, similar to the Chuck Norris Facts meme. And I got some pretty good factoids so far, which I will share here:

• The NSA doesn't publish. They perish.
• The NSA employs the largest number of mathematicians with Ph.D. And the most stupid and incompetent ones.
• The NSA has a patent for an efficient process for collecting a lot of information and doing nothing with it.
• The Bajoran scholars have positively identified Benjamin Sisko as The Emissary. They also positively identified the NSA headquarters as The Dungeon.
• One of Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s episodes took place in the NSA headquarters, but had to be destroyed, because all of the test audience had uncontrollable panic attacks.
• The NSA knows what you did last summer. But no one, in the NSA or outside it, knows why they should.
• The more the NSA think, the less they want to be able to think. So they think less and less.

Hope you enjoyed it and naturally - “ha ha, only serious!”. Now the ball is in your court - can you think of more? Put them in the comments below.

Happy NSA bashing!